Hello guys. It's been so long since I last wrote an article on here and Death by Beebles thought it was time for me to try again, so here goes...
I was just thinking the other day, after a VERY strange dream I had the night before, about what my plans were for the next 3 years, 1 year, 3 months, or even week were and I honestly didn't know other than the obvious goal of turning my school-work in.
The first thing I thought about was the short term... 'What will I do in the next month?'
Well, the first thing on my agenda is to figure out what I'm doing on the night of homecoming. A friend of mine, whom I believe you could guess the name of, wants me to go with her to this pretty big dance. I honestly don't know if I want to go to the dance and my mom just told me, about a week ago, that we had a family reunion that same day.
The next task to complete is deciding how I'm gonna get myself out of the huge hole I've dug myself into due to a few female entities who are just about fighting over me. I still don't know why they can't find someone else but oh well. All of the girls that I KNOW OF that like me, I don't like in the same way and they all know this. I always thought that once someone tells you they don't like you, you should leave them alone but I can't tell people to just simply go away for fear of hurting their feelings or whatever might come from it.
Ashley, don't wory. I think it's safe to say that you're the easiest one to get along with because you don't force yourself on me quite like these others. You know what I'm talking about better than I do so maybe that statement was enough to explain myself.
Then I came across the 'What do want to have done within the next 3 months?'
This one may be a bit more difficult to just start talking about because I'm not even sure if this is the smartest thing to be doing right at this moment.
I have told myself time and again that I don't want any relationships this year because it's too stressing, but I'm not sure if that's really how I feel or if it's just what I want to feel.
I ran into an old friend of mine a few days ago but I told myself that I don't want to deal with keeping old friends if I don't have to. But then I remembered how we used to go burn stuff around town and how we'd always beat up his little siblings.
(In case you were wondering Alex, I think that's why I'm not acting very much like a good friend lately)
I also have a pretty good friend that I have hung out with a few times in the past but I just haven't quite been able to decide if this friend of mine is really even a friend of mine or not.
I'm starting to think that I think too much.
Now I've got to talk about what's to come in the 'What do I plan on doing within the next year?'
I'm thinking this is the long enough time period to say that I think I just want to graduate and make sure I have all of my best friends' numbers... if I still have any when it's over. I also want to know I'm getting into a college that I want by the end of this year. Hopefully I'll even have myself a friend that I could go with. So far I MIGHT be going with my cousin. I basically just don't want to meet too many new people. I'd rather just have a few really close friends that I can talk to anytime I feel like I need to. That's why the internet rules! I'm not really MEETING anybody on here, I'm just saying stuff that COULD be true to him/her.
The last thing that I thought about was a future family.
Yeah... I don't even know why this one popped into my head because the only chance of that happening would be if I married the one person that I feel comfortable with at all times. I would rather adopt kids too. Who needs to give birth to be parents? There's plent of kids in the world. I have not yet found the person I seek but I think I'm getting closer.
The dream that started this whole issue with me???
Alright, so I fall asleep right? Then, I die. I go to "limbo" and I'm told I'm not known by God so I'm going to hell. This simply blunt set of events that came as little images in my head made me think this hard about such stupid, meeningless things in God's eyes.
After I got done thinking about all that junk I simply hit myself in the head and remember that I should be thinking about now, and how I'm gonna glorify my Jesus.
That problem was solved a bit faster... with the help of one of my good friends who told me she was wondering about how her petty problems didn't matter if we didn't solve them while doing all things in God's holy name.
We just kinda decided we'd help each other.
I'll end right there so you can tell me how horrible I am at writing now.
Capt. over and out!